Disturbed

I feel disturbed.. Seriously..

Girl, I wish you would let me in.. It hurts watching you in pain.. I wish you'd just let me talk to you or let someone else.. Stop shutting yourself away.. You're a diamond that's worth way more than you credit yourself for. Honestly... *hugz*

Watched Oprah today.. Channel surfing and for some reason I decided to just watch it.. BIG mistake.. I wish I didn't.. Felt emotions rushing back from the past.. a feeling I didn't want to experience again.. the intermingling of guilt and regret and sadness.. The emergence of issues and memories I had stuffed all the way at the back of my mind, hoping they wouldn't surface again.. Oh well...

I feel pretty useless with the job search.. It's getting depressing actually.. I just don't know what else to do now..