Happily ever afters

I'm exhausted.. My feet are killing me.. Whoever came up with heels for footwear should be stoned.. Aargh..

Anyway went for my appointment at Thomson Medical Centre this morning and I was proud of myself for not flinching at the sight of the needle.. Really.. It was an achievement! And I think I shocked alot of people by my sudden bravery.. :) Met Vic for a bit after that and roamed around Toa Payoh for a while checking out shoes and clothes and formulating masterplans.. haha.. We managed to tire ourselves out quite a bit before meeting Vasaantha to hang out and catch up on stuff.. That was nice and something that was pretty necessary, I must say.. Been eons since we just hung out to chit chat and share gossip and be the way we used used to be when we were in school.. :)

While talking to Vas I realised something.. How afraid and cautious we have both become.. How reluctant to open up and admit our feelings and thoughts.. How careful we are now when it comes to completely giving our trust to anyone.. How we will easily believe the words of a girl but endlessly doubt or ponder over the words that come from a guy.. I suppose it's all due to circumstances.. The situations we have been exposed to, the people we have seen get hurt, the things that happen, the way we see people treating others... The amount of tears, and lies and heartbreaks.. I suppose it feels like a never ending cycle.. It happens again and again and again.. A continuous sentence with no fullstop..

How can you be sure when you meet someone? How can you be certain he /she won't let go, that they will hold on with you and try to make it work the way you are willing to? How can you be convinced that they are not going to hurt you, that they are there to stay and will not walk out on you? How can you decide that this is it, that it's alright to give your trust, to leave your heart open with them and be sure that they will not trample all over it?How do you know they feel the same way about you as you do about them? How is it possible to be 100% sure? To make a lifetime decision with a complete stranger? You just feel it, I suppose...

We were talking about marriages.. How do you know that he / she is the one? How do you decide this is the one you want to wake up to each morning, go to bed with each night and do everything in between the day with? To live a life together, build a family together and live an entire lifetime with each other? It's life changing.. Pretty scary actually.. Getting into a new family, the worry of not being able to fit in.. Of getting approval of all those around you .. Of being a daughter to them instead of a daughter-in-law.. It isn't easy at all.. But I suppose that's the best part.. Getting past all this and being with someone you know you cannot do without.. Of reaching a point where you are able to adjust to any circumstance or discomfort because you love that person.. Of knowing you wouldn't have wanted it any other way...

Ultimately, it's all beautiful... But the path to that final destination is scary.. You are afraid of every bend and turn along the way and you have no clue what awaits you at the other end.. Oh well, I suppose you cannot do anything about it.. Just gotta wait till you meet your prince and hope your fairytale ends in a happily-ever-after, right Vas? *winkz*